Tactics For Approaching Someone Who Isn't Dressed Appropriately At A Funeral
Although the conventions for how you should dress at a funeral might not be as strict today as they once were, a funeral or visitation is still a place to dress in a respectful manner. This not only means that you should be cognizant of how you get dressed before you visit a funeral home, but that you should also ensure your family members are dressed in an appropriate manner. Although you don't have to feel as though you're the fashion police, you have a right to approach someone who is dressed inappropriately and say something. Here are some tips for doing so:
Ask To Speak In Private
You don't want to embarrass or center out the person who isn't dressed appropriately, so the best way to accomplish your goal is to ask to speak to the person in private. Try to catch someone in the lobby area of the funeral home before he or she goes into the room where the mourning family is. If you know the person, this job will be easier — you can approach the person, say it's nice to see him or her, and then ask to speak privately in a separate room. If you don't know the person, you may wish to approach him or her, introduce yourself and explain your relationship with the family, and then ask to speak privately.
Explain Without Judging
No one wants to feel centered out, criticized, and judged over his or her funeral attire. It's best to take a gentle approach and explain what you've noticed. For example, you might say that the person's halter top is a little revealing and that you know the family to be on the conservative side. Suggest that some the older family members might not respond favorably to someone dressed in such a manner, and say that you're just trying to help.
Offer A Solution
If the person has been receptive to your discussion, you may wish to offer a solution if you can think of one. This could be as simple as asking if the person has a jacket in his or her car, for example, or lives close enough that he or she could run home and be back before the end of the visitation. If you know the person well, you could offer to help in a different way. For example, you could say, "I'd be happy go through the visitation line first, and then I could give you my sweater to wrap over your shoulders before you go in."
Contact local funeral homes for more information and assistance.